Don't Call Me "Preacher."

Who is the one who prays at the family gatherings over meals? Who is the one who prays at family night suppers at church? Who else ... but ... "the Preacher." Recently I was at a birthday party for a rather classy chap. Half-way joking he said to me, "You're the professional, you pray."

Typically I find several attitudes towards "The Preacher" in the Southern Traditional Church.

• One is that the preacher is a Lucky Rabbit's Foot, a spiritual talisman. If you're sick, if you're having a bad day, make sure the preacher is around. His presence alone can ward off the evil spirits and bring good fortune. Too bad this doesn't work for the non church world ... I could make a killing at the state fair!
• Another similar but somewhat different attitude is that the preacher is a magic silver bullet. If we're stumped, if we're sick, if we're feeling bad, then go and get the preacher ... for heaven's sake. He is THE SOLUTION. After all preacher prayers work better than common, vulgar prayers. If your congregation is dying ... no problem ... just bring in a young whipper-snapper and he can pull a dynamic congregation out of his hat.
• The preacher is an Old Testament prophet/seer type. You can run to him and God will tell you through him the answers to all your problems. Leave a tip in the offering plate and he will forcast your future for you. (I certainly could make a killing off that one at the state fair.)
• The preacher is God. What he says is law. What he thinks is not simply opinion. It is mathematical law. It is his way or the highway ... to hell. Turn or burn baby! It's his job to call the adult-sized, adult-aged teen-agers to order ... because they can't do this themselves.
• The preacher is an island god. We dress him up, bring him out at fancy dinners, call him fancy names like "Reverend" and "Minister". We take up generous collections for him at Christmas ... while only giving the elderly shut-ins fruit baskets. While we smile and nod to him now, we're really fattening him up simply to eat him later.
• The preacher is the scape goat for all problems flowing from the above thinking.

While most people certainly mean well, there's simply no ignoring the elephant in the sanctuary. The preacher is the paid professional Christian on staff. It is his job to do church stuff, while it is my job simply to live right and stay out of jail. The preacher does the church stuff, and I as the "lay" person simply consume the product of his hands. After all I'm not as smart as the preacher ... until it comes to particular social issues that I simply think he is crazy wrong about.

Please, don't call me preacher. Everything I do (or should do) flows from my heart of worship as an "ordinary" Christian ... and not simply because I'm paid to eat fried chicken and sip iced tea with the old ladies for a living.